Wednesday, June 27
What a Bust!
Three days, two juries and two plea bargins. At least I can't be called for jury duty for another three years!
Monday, June 25
Law and Order, MP Style
I thought it would never happen, but I've been seated on a jury! I am a juror for a murder/armed robbery trial. Of all the times I've ever had jury duty, I've never been selected! Now you know I can't discuss the trial until it's over, but I will be making mental notes for the blog! Wow! Cool, but also kinda creepy.
Friday, June 22
Add This to the "Should Never Do" List
I just found out that Dan, who works at the landfill and one of our recycling collection stations, has 70 cats. S-E-V-E-N-T-Y cats. He was complaining that the Town of Pine Ridge is getting on to him to build a pen for them. Now y'all know I'm a cat lover, but two is plenty for me. SEVENTY cats. He said he spends $500 on cat food. I know my mouth was wide open the whole time he was telling me about it.
Tuesday, June 19
Things a Man Should Never Do After 30
Compliments of Esquire. Here are a few of my favorites:
6. Do impressions of Austin Powers characters, especially Dr. Evil.
17. Remove your shirt in public--unless there is sand and a large body of water nearby.
20. Own a futon.
38. Wear a jersey with the name of a professional athlete on the back.
Hee hee.
Ladies, I'm sure we could add to the list! My personal suggestions:
Pierce any body part.
Wear khaki pants and a navy blazer. (Heck, quit doing that at 14.)
Drive with the stereo so loud that the car behind you shakes.
Get a summer crew cut.
6. Do impressions of Austin Powers characters, especially Dr. Evil.
17. Remove your shirt in public--unless there is sand and a large body of water nearby.
20. Own a futon.
38. Wear a jersey with the name of a professional athlete on the back.
Hee hee.
Ladies, I'm sure we could add to the list! My personal suggestions:
Pierce any body part.
Wear khaki pants and a navy blazer. (Heck, quit doing that at 14.)
Drive with the stereo so loud that the car behind you shakes.
Get a summer crew cut.
Wal-Mart Whine
So, what would YOUR name be for Wal-Mart wine? Mine would be "Wal-Mart Whine," in honor of the multitudes of screaming, crying kids I see in there anytime I go.
FYI, I am not necessarily a Wal-Mart snob; I go when absolutely necessary, and I didn't come up with the list at the end that some of you may find snooty.
BENTONVILLE, ARK (AP) - Some Walmart customers soon will be able to sample a new discount item -- Walmart's own brand of wine. The world's largest retail chain is teaming up with E&J Gallo Winery of Modesto, Calif., to produce the spirits at an affordable price; in the $6-8 range. While wine connoisseurs may not be inclined to throw a bottle of Walmart brand wine into their shopping carts, there is a market for inexpensive wine, said Kathy Micken, professor of marketing at Roger WilliamsUniversity in Bristol, R.I. She said: "The right name is important."
So, with that in mind, here are the top 12 suggested names for Walmart Wine:
12. Chateau Traileur Doublewide
11. White Trashfindel
10. Big Red Gulp
9. Grape Expectations
8. Domaine Walmart "Merde du Pays"
7. NASCARbernet
6. Chef Boyardeaux
5. Peanut Noir
4. Chateau des Moines
3. I Can't Believe It's Not Vinegar!
2. World Championship Wriesling
And the number 1 name for Walmart Wine...
1. Nasti Spumante
FYI, I am not necessarily a Wal-Mart snob; I go when absolutely necessary, and I didn't come up with the list at the end that some of you may find snooty.
BENTONVILLE, ARK (AP) - Some Walmart customers soon will be able to sample a new discount item -- Walmart's own brand of wine. The world's largest retail chain is teaming up with E&J Gallo Winery of Modesto, Calif., to produce the spirits at an affordable price; in the $6-8 range. While wine connoisseurs may not be inclined to throw a bottle of Walmart brand wine into their shopping carts, there is a market for inexpensive wine, said Kathy Micken, professor of marketing at Roger WilliamsUniversity in Bristol, R.I. She said: "The right name is important."
So, with that in mind, here are the top 12 suggested names for Walmart Wine:
12. Chateau Traileur Doublewide
11. White Trashfindel
10. Big Red Gulp
9. Grape Expectations
8. Domaine Walmart "Merde du Pays"
7. NASCARbernet
6. Chef Boyardeaux
5. Peanut Noir
4. Chateau des Moines
3. I Can't Believe It's Not Vinegar!
2. World Championship Wriesling
And the number 1 name for Walmart Wine...
1. Nasti Spumante
Second Sin
Okay, I got a sample of this today and used it, thinking, "Yeah, right," but it works! Tres cool! I will be buying a full size of this one!You know I'm a Sephora addict. They have another special going on, but I forgot the coupon code and can't seem to find it. DRAT...
But before you order, Google "Sephora Coupon." That's how I find out about a lot of their deals. Oh, and deal or no deal, you always get the three free samples with your order. FUN! And much easier and more pleasant than ULTA - don't even get me started!
Thursday, June 14
From Today's Waste News, REALLY!
Toto, I don't think I'm in Kansas anymore!
Sad stories like this crop up way too often. A body -- a human being, someone´s parent or sibling or child -- is discovered at a landfill, or at a recycling plant, or inside a garbage truck.
Usually the victim is identified as a homeless person, or someone who for one reason or another had decided to catch a few winks inside a trash bin. A collection truck had come along on its route and emptied the bin before the sleeper could wake up and scramble out, and, well ... there´s little more to be said, except that it has to be a horrific way to go, and your heart goes out to the victim.
Or victims. In this case the story involves a married couple. Their bodies were found at two paper recycling plants a thousand miles apart, one in St. Louis, the other in Arizona.
Doesn´t this type of accident make you wonder, as it does me, if there aren´t some unexplored avenues or underemployed measures that might be put into effect in an effort to reduce the frequency of such occurrences?
If anyone has any ideas or comments on this subject, please send them my way. Time and space permitting, I´ll include the best of them in a future column.
Pete Fehrenbach is managing editor of Waste News. Past installments of this column are collected in the Inbox archive
Sad stories like this crop up way too often. A body -- a human being, someone´s parent or sibling or child -- is discovered at a landfill, or at a recycling plant, or inside a garbage truck.
Usually the victim is identified as a homeless person, or someone who for one reason or another had decided to catch a few winks inside a trash bin. A collection truck had come along on its route and emptied the bin before the sleeper could wake up and scramble out, and, well ... there´s little more to be said, except that it has to be a horrific way to go, and your heart goes out to the victim.
Or victims. In this case the story involves a married couple. Their bodies were found at two paper recycling plants a thousand miles apart, one in St. Louis, the other in Arizona.
Doesn´t this type of accident make you wonder, as it does me, if there aren´t some unexplored avenues or underemployed measures that might be put into effect in an effort to reduce the frequency of such occurrences?
If anyone has any ideas or comments on this subject, please send them my way. Time and space permitting, I´ll include the best of them in a future column.
Pete Fehrenbach is managing editor of Waste News. Past installments of this column are collected in the Inbox archive
Tuesday, June 12
Stack Bundles?
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19188614/
Is that like Ream Papers? Or Polymers Plastic? Or Books Volume?
What would YOUR rapper name be? No, I don't have a quiz to give you one - although I bet there IS one - I'm just curious what you would call yourself.
Is that like Ream Papers? Or Polymers Plastic? Or Books Volume?
What would YOUR rapper name be? No, I don't have a quiz to give you one - although I bet there IS one - I'm just curious what you would call yourself.
Top Ten President Bush Global Warming Solutions
Courtesy of Late Night with David Letterman
10. Instead of "Partly sunny," have weatherman say "Partly cloudy"
9. Stop using Air Force One for Texas barbecue runs
8. Replace dangerous CO2 in the atmosphere with more eco-friendly CO1
7. Encourage people to walk more by distributing free Dr. Scholl massaging gel inserts. Are you gellin'?
6. Watch Al Gore movie one of these nights instead of "Dukes of Hazzard"
5. Bob Barker's free. Get him workin' on it
4. Send more troops to Iraq
3. I dunno, tax cuts for the rich?
2. Reduce hot air emissions by cancelling "The View"
1. Resign
10. Instead of "Partly sunny," have weatherman say "Partly cloudy"
9. Stop using Air Force One for Texas barbecue runs
8. Replace dangerous CO2 in the atmosphere with more eco-friendly CO1
7. Encourage people to walk more by distributing free Dr. Scholl massaging gel inserts. Are you gellin'?
6. Watch Al Gore movie one of these nights instead of "Dukes of Hazzard"
5. Bob Barker's free. Get him workin' on it
4. Send more troops to Iraq
3. I dunno, tax cuts for the rich?
2. Reduce hot air emissions by cancelling "The View"
1. Resign
I'm Wonder Woman!
A Beautiful princess with great strength of character! What superhero are you?Click here to take the Superhero quiz.
Monday, June 11
Occupational Hazard
AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
As part of a school presentation I do, I scatter assorted trash and recyclables around the room, and the students pick up a piece and tell the class whether they'd recycle it, reuse it or throw it away. For MONTHS, I've been saving bottles and jars and cans from home to create a new recycling presentation box. I've cleaned everything just so, taken care to dull sharp edges and collected GREAT examples of each type and size of plastic. I was so excited and ready to use it soon!
I've had the items stored in a mini recycling bin in my office for over a month now, so imagine my surprise when I looked at it today and it was EMPTY! You guessed it, the cleaning staff had RECYCLED everything this weekend!
To look at the bright side, it's great to have a cleaning staff that actually collects our recyclables. The Chamber staff wouldn't pick up a gum wrapper from the bathroom floor for days, much less pick up our recyclables.
I will obviously have to start over and instead of leaving the mini bin on the floor, move it to a shelf and put a "Presentation Materials - Please Don't Recycle or Trash" sign on it.
The banging you hear is my head on my desk...
I think this is what they call baptism by fire!
As part of a school presentation I do, I scatter assorted trash and recyclables around the room, and the students pick up a piece and tell the class whether they'd recycle it, reuse it or throw it away. For MONTHS, I've been saving bottles and jars and cans from home to create a new recycling presentation box. I've cleaned everything just so, taken care to dull sharp edges and collected GREAT examples of each type and size of plastic. I was so excited and ready to use it soon!
I've had the items stored in a mini recycling bin in my office for over a month now, so imagine my surprise when I looked at it today and it was EMPTY! You guessed it, the cleaning staff had RECYCLED everything this weekend!
To look at the bright side, it's great to have a cleaning staff that actually collects our recyclables. The Chamber staff wouldn't pick up a gum wrapper from the bathroom floor for days, much less pick up our recyclables.
I will obviously have to start over and instead of leaving the mini bin on the floor, move it to a shelf and put a "Presentation Materials - Please Don't Recycle or Trash" sign on it.
The banging you hear is my head on my desk...
I think this is what they call baptism by fire!
Friday, June 1
Weighing In
Okay, so I said I wouldn't give you all of the details about the landfill, but I lied. I found some great pictures and thought I'd start sharing them from time to time. Y'all need to know this!
First lesson in Landfill 101 is the scalehouse. Remember me blogging about the truck who blew out two tires the first day? It happened on the scales.
All kinds of trucks come in every day to bring various items to the landfill. Some actually go into the landfill here, others go into the transfer station for eventual transportation to the Screaming Eagle landfill, which accepts a lot more stuff. (At our landfill, we only accept yard waste, construction/demolition debris and brown goods, aka furniture type waste. More on actual landfills later.)
The trucks drive onto the giant scales, which are housed "in the driveway" for lack of a better explanation. See the rails that guide them? When a trucks runs into those, that's when the tires explode. And trust me, if you're right by the scales and not ready for it, it will scare the @#$%& outta you!
Anyway, we get everything from huge trash trucks to residents pulling trailers, and everyone has to go over the scale to weigh their debris. That's how we know how much to charge them.
For residents, we just estimate the weight of their vehicle and subtract it to get the approximate weight of their load. For trucks that come in on a regular basis, i.e. Waste Management, they are issued a sticker with a number, and we have their "empty weight" on file.
Still others ride over the scales full, get a weight, dump their stuff and come back over for an empty weight.
There is always one person working inside the scalehouse, which is part of the administration building, where my office is located. We have the two very nice ladies who alternate days in the scalehouse, Cat and Linda. They have the patience of somebody I don't have and must have it to work with some of the folks who come over the scales. Just as we women may lie on the scales, some people also try to qualify for the resident rate - FREE - when their load is obviously not from a residence.
First lesson in Landfill 101 is the scalehouse. Remember me blogging about the truck who blew out two tires the first day? It happened on the scales.
All kinds of trucks come in every day to bring various items to the landfill. Some actually go into the landfill here, others go into the transfer station for eventual transportation to the Screaming Eagle landfill, which accepts a lot more stuff. (At our landfill, we only accept yard waste, construction/demolition debris and brown goods, aka furniture type waste. More on actual landfills later.)
The trucks drive onto the giant scales, which are housed "in the driveway" for lack of a better explanation. See the rails that guide them? When a trucks runs into those, that's when the tires explode. And trust me, if you're right by the scales and not ready for it, it will scare the @#$%& outta you!Anyway, we get everything from huge trash trucks to residents pulling trailers, and everyone has to go over the scale to weigh their debris. That's how we know how much to charge them.
For residents, we just estimate the weight of their vehicle and subtract it to get the approximate weight of their load. For trucks that come in on a regular basis, i.e. Waste Management, they are issued a sticker with a number, and we have their "empty weight" on file.
Still others ride over the scales full, get a weight, dump their stuff and come back over for an empty weight. There is always one person working inside the scalehouse, which is part of the administration building, where my office is located. We have the two very nice ladies who alternate days in the scalehouse, Cat and Linda. They have the patience of somebody I don't have and must have it to work with some of the folks who come over the scales. Just as we women may lie on the scales, some people also try to qualify for the resident rate - FREE - when their load is obviously not from a residence. I found out something interesting about the scales as we started our office weight loss contest this week. The scales are only accurate to 20 lbs. For instance, if you weigh 300 lbs., the scales could weigh you at 300, 280 or 320. So it wouldn't be good to use for the weight loss contest.
Feel like you learned anything?
Coming this weekend - maybe - pictures of my new office, which is tres cool!
Just a Teas
Today kicks off National Iced Tea Month! To celebrate, I had iced tea at the South Congaree House of Pizza, but not sweet tea! (Unless you count the many artificial sweeteners I added!)
And while we're on the subject, click here to learn everything you wanted to know and more about iced tea.
So, where do you get your favorite iced tea? Sister swears by Hooligan's in Trenholm Plaza. I like it anywhere someone else makes it, myself. I'm the only woman in the South who can't make iced tea.
We're So GLAD
Check out this red Gladiola in our yard! It just appeared this Saturday - quite a surprise. Beautiful, lipstick red! Props to Sister for the pic...Speaking of the yard, what a find I made in the garage! Another snakeskin! I started to pull it down, and it kept coming. When I finally retrieved it, I held it up, and it was taller than me. I usually like to keep those things, but this just creeped me out. I threw it in the "Herbie Curbie," but realized that was cruel and unusual punishment for the trash folk, so I pulled it out and stuffed it deep into one of the trash bags. I wonder where that snake is now?! I hope I won't find out.
For those of you hanging on the edge of your seats, I promise to do better blogging. I've just fallen out o' the habit.
Work has been lots of new and exciting stuff, but I realize you may not all want to hear about my days at the landfill. I'll try to limit it to the exciting stuff like lost church money and found kittens. Probably the most exciting thing is that I'm still getting up at 5:30/45 a.m. and making it to work by 8 every morning. AMAZING for a girl who until two weeks ago never got out of bed until the first half hour of Today was over.
I've gotten back into reading lately. I'm in the Stephen King mode, mostly because I know I like it. I tried to read Lisey's Story, but it lost me midway - too far out. A few nights ago, I started Cell, which seems to be better. My "book club" chose Catherine the Great this time, and I just couldn't do it. So if any of you have any recommendations for suspenseful books that aren't bloody, cheesy theme mysteries or about Southern ladies or Sweet Potato Queens, send them my way.
A quick shout out to Roxanne who starts a new job on Monday. Girl, come back home - we miss you! And we must have dinner soon - so much to show and tell. And our gorilla waiter misses us!
Parting story. Winston says that living with two girls makes life tough! This morning, he was sleeping on my bed when Pikachu the Cat dared to run by and cast a glance at his beloved Cliffy. As he jumped off the bed, his back leg got caught up in one of my bras, and he dragged it around the house as he chased the cat. You could almost hear Pika laughing as Winnie freaked out. It's hard to be tough with lingerie around your leg!
And on that note, have a good weekend, and watch your back legs!
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